Epilogue

Christos Voskrese! Voistinnu Voskrese!

Christ is Risen! He is risen indeed!

Growing up with grandparents who attended a Byzantine Orthodox church, this was how we greeted each other on Easter morning. In following this tradition, I greet you with these words in hopes that your day will be filled with Easter joy!

Goals: Accomplishments, Failures, Self- Evaluation

1. Alcohol. I successfully gave up alcohol for a significant period of time for the first time in my life. I have not had a drink or even cooked with alcohol for the last 46 days.  This has been new for me and it has felt really good to have accomplished this task. Granted, it was not easy. For me, alcohol has been an occasional  cure all for stress, loneliness and decompression but knowing that Jesus gave up so much for me made it bearable. When I felt like I was going to cave, I simply remembered what He did for me and thought, if He can do it, so can I. Going forward, however, I have decided to adopt a new mindset on drinking. Because I do everything at warp speed, I tend to drink too quickly, so from now on to slow my rate of alcohol consumption, I plan to drink a glass of water or a glass of tonic water for every glass of alcohol I consume.

2. Sun Submissions. As of yesterday, I finished and mailed all 5 of the writing prompts that I set out to address and sent them off to the The Sun. Whether or not any of them will be published remains to be seen. The following subjects were the topics upon which I wrote: Fire, Danger, Right and Wrong, Clothes, and First Love.

3. Watercolour Wednesdays.  These were a great success (emotionally, if not always artistically)! It was really nice having something to look forward to during the middle of the week and I know that my best friend enjoyed them just as much as I did. Although we may not continue to paint every Wednesday, we do plan on continuing this new tradition.

4. Children's Stories. Here I was a dismal failure. I only sent out one children's story to one publisher and did not contact any artists about illustrating my children's stories. In my heart I believe my stories have merit, but believing that anyone else will agree with me is quite another thing. I guess this is what it comes down to: it's a numbers game. There are a zillion publishers out there and a zillion writers. You have to be that one lucky writer who manages somehow through fate to get connected to a publisher who sees worth in your writing and that's just about impossible. This is really disheartening and I quite frankly feel disheartened. It's really too bad, because in my heart of hearts, this is one goal I really want to accomplish: to see my children's stories published in book form with my children's names on the dedication pages. Oh well, we can't win them all.

5. Blogging. First the numbers: My posts as of this moment have received 961 page views. The top 4 countries where my posts have been read are (in order) The United States (885 posts), Germany (28 posts) and  Thailand (28 posts) (thank Lottie!) . Bulgaria comes in number 3 thanks to my husband's family. Interestingly, according to the map which shows where my readers are located I seem to have an audience in Alaska. This is really cool since I've always wanted to visit Alaska and see the Aurora Borealis. (So much so that even one of my 4 year old sons knows what this is.) Sadly, comments were few and far between. Thanks though to those of you who did comment or who emailed me their feedback. It was great to know that I was not alone. Finally, although this has been a great experience in that I have pushed myself to be more disciplined as a writer, the downside to blogging is simply that mentally, it has taken a lot away from my children. I have thought about what I am going to write about constantly and frankly anytime anything takes me away from my children, I am less of a mother to them. In the end, I am happy I undertook this project but I will be just as happy to unplug, refocus and just live in the moment for a while.

Henry Higgins (aka The Cat)

As of today, we still have the cat but we are going to try and take him to a farm as we just can't keep him. Twice in the last 2 weeks, my son has been in the ER because of breathing issues. My throat closes up around him and he makes me itch. This is crushing as he is such a love and is a true lap cat. Unfortunately, I just can't continue to itch every time I pick him up. Not picking him up is not an option as he seems lonely and continually seeks me out for affection. For now, we have named him Henry Higgins because just like Eliza Doolittle swears to get Henry Higgins in My Fair Lady, our 1st cat, Silver Bell swears to swipe at Henry every chance she gets. Please- if you know anyone who would love him, let me know.

Finally, in a twist on the immortal wolds of Buzz Light Year:

To Infinity and Beyond!

And as a parting gift, let me leave you with a piece of music my Father always played for me on Easter morning:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToNb-02n3KY&list=PL06F22145AE0F4938

Bell Well. Be Happy and
Be at Peace. 

Day 46

In Search of the Golden Egg. Today I took my twins on an Easter Egg hunt. It was held in our town park and it was really quite a marvel. Thousands of real eggs had been dyed and strewn across the park grass. Age appropriate areas had been roped off and at the sound of a whistle, hundreds of children stormed forth in search of Easter eggs. 3 minutes later, the hunt was over. My sons had each found three eggs. Their comment, "Mom, this wasn't really fun." No, I thought, this wasn't. But then again, this isn't what Easter is all about anyway, so taking our eggs, we made our way over to my Mom's house and shared our bounty with her. She got 4, we kept 2. On our way home, I smiled at my children and laughed with them about the hunt. They were neither upset, nor did they worry that they hadn't found enough. They were simply content with the one golden egg left in each of their pails. The moral of this story: Again (because you've heard it before), it's not the quantity, but the quality that counts.

Day 45 Good Friday

The Friday that is Good. Today has been hectic: back to back therapist appointments for one of my twins, a rushed lunch and off to a community wide church service. But as today is a holy day, it is important that I take time to reflect on the great sacrifice that was made by the Savior. Today I am happy because my Lord sacrificed himself so that I - we - can be with him for eternal life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlkxYDvyQ84

John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

Week Seven Paintings

Pink Forsythia?

Day 44 Holy Thursday

Chocolate. Today my Mother, the twins and I made our annual trek over the hills to visit the best chocolatier in the area. For those of you in the know, yes, I'm talking about Victoria's. There we stood in line gazing at the various confections which ranged from hollow filled chocolate Easter eggs to chocolate covered sea salt pretzels to old fashioned rock candy. After making our Easter purchases, my mother treated me to my very favorite childhood candy: peanut butter melt aways. As I walked out of the store savoring every last bite of my treat, I thought, yes, this is truly a slice of Heaven.

Day 43

Look for this week's Wednesday painting on Thurday due to a previously scheduled appointment.

Rocks. Are Cool?! Yeah, they are! I have always loved rocks. When I was a little kid my Dad had a collection of rocks which he displayed at eye level on his book shelves. I think this is what got me hooked on them. They were never taboo. I could pick them up. Touch them. Turn them over. Look at them any time I pleased. My Dad also had a friend who was an amateur geologist. He had this amazing collection of rocks in his basement. He even had a moon rock. Anyway, my son is really into rocks. He has a nature collection box (my old lunch pail from the 80's) in which he puts his rocks. This week I surprised him by checking out a book and a video on rocks from the library and today I pulled out my own rock collection. He has now stood for the last hour microscope in hand examining every nuance of these rocks. He is such a little scientist! How cool is that!

Day 42

Wild Wacky Weather! This morning as my children and I were eating breakfast, I happened to glance out the kitchen window only to be surprised by the fact that my forsythia was blooming. When I pointed this out to my son, he happily acknowledged that this was a "sign of Spring". Later today it began to rain, and as he splashed in the puddles, he noted that the weather was cooler. I laughing told him that we were supposed to get snow.  How surprised was I when just a few hours ago, it really did begin to snow and he said, "Mom, now we can go sledding!"

Day 41

Putting My House in Order. Sometimes things get out of control and I seem to be in a downward spiral. Lately I've felt like I've bit off more than I chew and today I hit the wall. Total meltdown. Luckily at age 41, I am still humble enough to know when I need some outside guidance. Today, I relied upon my parents and trusted in their wisdom. After talking to them and following their guidance, I feel much better. This afternoon as I took the time to sit on the floor and play with my sons, I thought about the importance of putting my house in order. First God, then my children and husband. Everything else can wait. Peace through Priority.

Day 40

a clerical note .... as I am counting all of the days in Lent and not skipping Sundays, this blog will continue for the next week and conclude on Easter. Happy Reading!

Created in 1884 by George Seurat,  A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte, is an idyllic example pointillism, one of my favorite methods of painting.

Sunday in the Park.  This morning as I awoke to this beautiful day of our Lord, I pictured my family spending a quiet afternoon in the park together. So after breakfast, I packed a picnic, play shoes and tee-shirts  and told the children that today we would have a special treat after church. The boys were so excited that they could hardly contain themselves. After church, we drove to a local park, unpacked our picnic and enjoyed the warm afternoon with our children. This is the day that the Lord hath made! Let us rejoice and be glad in it!

Day 39

Fresh Air, Times Square! How wonderful it was to catch the scent of wild chives in the air as I emerged from my home this morning. That unique scent brings so much joy that I immediately envision a veritable plethora of dishes topped with this Spring divinity. In a few weeks, many tufts of this delight will emerge and spread throughout the fields. As the weather turns warmer, I look forward to rolling down my cars windows and inhaling this familiar scent. Fresh air, who needs Times Square?

Day 38

Chasing bubbles because as opposed to chasing rainbows,
upon occasion you can actually catch one! 

Day 37

I am writing early this morning because after reading my devotions, the 3 x 5 card that I keep in my Bible which has a list of people I pray for, fell into my hand. As I thought about my prayers for them, I realized that I was praying for each of their happiness in special ways. Then I thought about this blog and how my prayers relate to it's theme. So today, I wanted to recognize these people and pray for each of them publicly. Please pray with me.

Dear Lord,
Please give give B. a moment of happiness in which she fondly thinks of her father.
As J. struggles to breathe, please bring a smile to his face as he reads something which gives him joy.
Please bring joy to Mom's heart as she looks out her window and glimpses signs of Spring and her flowers preparing to bloom.
Please bring my husband joy as he is not feeling well and is so far away from us working to support us.
Please let my children feel joy when they are around me and help ease conflict between us.
Please ease R.'s OCD and let her enjoy everyday happiness. She is such a beautiful person.
Please help M. and her husband to glimpse how they used to love each other and work within their marriage for healing.
Please ease K.'s loneliness and ache in her heart. Bring a smile to her face when she thinks of all those that love her.
Please let G & A share in many smiles and laughter today.

Lord, I know that we often come to you with a list and today is no different. But I come to you with this list because I know that all things are possible through you. I love you Lord.
Amen.

Week Six Paintings

Getting Ready for Easter

Day 36

I find great joy in old things, esp. old pictures. I collect all types, but my 2 favorites are stereoscopes and old black and white photos of everyday happenings. I love to look at informal pictures of people from long ago. It always makes me slightly sad when I walk into a shop and see them for sale. I imagine that one day pictures precious to me may also someday find their way into a shop. So I rescue them and am compiling a box of these precious images. One day I am going to make a special scrap book of these pictures and call it "This is Not My Beautiful Life". Thanks David Byrne.

S.O.S. con't

So back to the cat. He still makes me itch, but boy is he loveable. As I write, he's sitting here on my lap, purring away. Problem is- as soon as I get up, I'll have to wash my hands or else I'll break out in hives. Can anyone take him?

Day 35

I read a statement today which I found to be quite profound. It read, "The young man or woman who aspires to become an artist but who is not willing to take that risk will have no chance whatever of being remembered. Art is a confrontation in which one gambles his or her life." (The Novel, James Michener) With this statement I am in agreement and yet I find it somewhat limiting in respect to my philosophy about finding joy in everyday life. There is risk in art. No doubt any time an individual creates something and "puts it out there", the artist risks criticism, failure, non-interest and self. Yet, perhaps not all art is to be remembered. Indeed, much of it has been forgotten, neglected, down graded or even simply discarded. That does not mean it has not been meaningful in it's base creation. For instance, on Wednesdays, I paint with my best friend. Neither of us is particularly good, but the camaraderie felt during those sessions is priceless. We laugh, we cry, we talk, we are silent. We simply exist in the moment and art is the thing of beauty which binds us in that moment, so even though perhaps we are not gambling with our lives, we are creating memories and synthesizing a relationship which will last forever.

Day 34

Teddy Bear Picnic

Q: Ever wonder what to do with all those Honey Bear jars?

A: Have a Teddy Bear Picnic, of course!

Decorate jars with colorful craft paper and ribbon. Coat inside with glow in the dark glitter glue.

 Decorate dining room with trees, bear books, bears and blankets.

Set out picnic food including honey and peanut butter sandwiches.

 Display more bears and teddy bear craft. Read Teddy Bear Picnic during dessert.

Send children home with cool glow in the dark bears.

Admittedly, I'm crafty and love throwing theme parties, but this was really easy. The cousins (all 8 of them) really enjoyed it.

Day 33

Good Neighbors. I live in a town, technically a borough, filled with good neighbors. In my last home, an apartment complex of roughly 1,000+ people, I didn't know one person. Now, I am on a first name basis with many of my neighbors. Many a warm day I'll spend time talking "over the fence" with one of my neighbors.

Today, I took some time getting to know a single mother who lives next door to me. She was very nice and I really enjoyed in our conversation. Not only that, as we were talking, she told me she was planning on entering a nursing program to provide a better life for her and her son. I was thinking about this and remembered a program I had heard about which helped low income individuals enter the nursing field, but I could not  remember the name of it. I told her that I knew another neighbor who would know and that I would get in contact with her within the week. It wasn't 20 minutes later that I saw that neighbor. I asked her to join our conversation and she told the mother all about the program. When I left, the Mom was so excited, she planned to go right inside to Google that program. Just think- had I not taken the time to speak with her, she might never have known about this fantastic opportunity. Taking the time to get to know people can really produce amazing results.

Day 32

Communication. Navigation through oral, visual and virtual vehicles can be complex and difficult.  Add in the ego and attempt to place our own ideas upon others further complicates things. Yet, every once in a while, we get it right. Usually this happens when we first listen, then think and then speak. I am learning this habit, but constantly need to remind myself of the steps in this process. Today, though, I had success when listening first to my husband, then thinking about what he had said and then responding. One less argument, one more bridge gaped.

Day 31

Friday Night Meals. For many families, Friday nights are pizza nights. For me, they are a little something more. As my husband is often away during the weekdays, they are the first night of the week when we, as a family, get to sit down and enjoy a meal together. Tonight, I have made pulled pork sandwiches, potato salad, a green salad and a Best Darn Cake (pineapple, pecan cake with a cream cheese icing) all from scratch. To me, this simple country meal is a celebratory meal which will not only fill our stomachs but renew our spirits as we partake together. (And by the way, the secret to a great potato salad is lots of fresh dill.)

Day 30

Spring Cleaning. I love when the first warm Spring day appears and I can open a window or two and begin to air out the house after a long, cold winter. That first burst of fresh air always inspires me to begin my Spring cleaning. I start one room at a time, moving the furniture, dusting the cobwebs, polishing the old wood on the antiques, vacuuming and cleaning the windows. Of course, it doesn't last as the children shuffle in in their muddy shoes and the cat sheds her winter coat, but  I do love the feel of the house when it has had it's first Spring cleaning. Life renewed. Isn't it a wonderful?

Week Five Paintings

Pineapple Explosion!

Day 29

Anthropomorphism - an interpretation of what is not human or personal in terms of human or personal characteristics. Examples: The flower sadly wilted without the benefit of rain or sun. The woman placed the vase upon the mantle and it radiated the warmth of the room around it. Each night I cried as I imagined the poor animal shivering in the cold. (and so on... you get the idea.) In summary, I could no longer stand the idea of the homeless cat, so back into the bathtub it went today and is now purring happily in the extra bedroom upstairs. Silverbell, our first stray, is menacingly stalking the door in hopes of challenging this newcomer's position. And I am hoping we will be able to whether the allergies and asthma which may come in the future. Mom and Uncle Gene- thanks so much for offering to help support this new endeavor. I love you guys!
 
By the way, I really like this:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUa2v1jc70Q

Day 28

Yes! Today I made it my mission to omit the word  "--"  and just say the opposite - YES!  It started out simply enough with the realization that I say the word "--" too often. In fact, my world and, in turn, my children's world is filled with the word "--". Because of this, undue stress is often self-inflicted upon our lives and so I thought, why not try something different. I will be honest. It was not  easy to do, but as the day wore on, it got easier. Examples of this include: Can we each have something different for lunch? Yes! Can we help you wash the cat? Yes! Can we ride our bikes? Yes! In the mud? N.... Uh ... (scramble) I would prefer you ride on the macadam! (Smile) (Macadam?) And so the day continued with the culmination at dinner time at my Mom's house, when my son asked me, "Mom, can I sleep here tonight?" "What?????" "Mom, I can sleep at Nana's house." "You mean you don't want to come home with Mommy?" "No." "Okay- yes." Hmmm? Wasn't everyone supposed to be in on this?

Day 27

Spring in the air and snow on the ground. What a strange sight this is to behold! My, how I wonder at the world in which we live when I can see the green stems of my plants peeping out from underneath the snow while the birds chirp and the warm sun beats down upon my brow. How nice it is to know that the snow will not stay but simply melt away and in another day, Spring will truly return.

Day 26

When I am old, I shall wear purple ... or so the poem by Jenny Joseph goes. Personally, most days I prefer black. Although when I am of the age of which Joseph writes, I may exercise the right to reconsider. Today, though, when there is hail in the air, the clouds are heavy with gray swirls and the winds carries a chill, I opt for turquoise to remind me of the sea which is deep and the sky which is unfathomable. Choose your colors well and stick not with those that carry heaviness, but with those which reflect the Spring in your heart.

Leaving a Comment

For those that have desperately tried to leave a post and have been unsuccessful, I apologize. It is a formidable task trying to understand the nuances of this program. Now, however, I have fixed the glitch and you should be able post following these simple directions:

1. Click on No Comments
2. Add your Comment to the Box
3. Choose your Profile Style (Use google if you have gmail)
4. You will be directed to Sign into your google account (gmail)
5. Choose a Blogger Profile (option #2) unless you use Google + and click enter
6. Choose a Display Name
Then, you will be redirected back to the blog where, hopefully, your comment will appear. - Sorry this is so complicated.

I look forward to communing with you ... someone ... anyone?

Day 25

The Peaceable Kingdom. This afternoon as I watched my husband doze on the couch and the twins playing quietly on the floor, I thought about how we crave peace in our homes as well as in the world. For us, a people who spend much of our time at war and in anger, this may not feasible, but perhaps if we string all of these precious moments together, we may get a glimpse of this paradise.

S.O.S

If you have read my posts in the last week, you know that I have twice tried to adopt a stray cat but cannot do so due to my son's allergies and asthma. This cat is a small male with grey and light yellow  tiger striping and has just about the most loving personality I've ever seen in a cat. He purrs loudly when any human approaches and just wants to be loved. Every day I walk to and from my mom's house and pass this cat. Every day my hearts breaks for him. He desperately wants to be loved. Please - although I know no one ever responds to me - won't someone take him?

Day 24

Friendship. It finds us in the most unlikely places. A kind word in a doctor's office. A smile across the grocery carts lanes. An unknown driver who waves as he passes by. We all need human connections. To quote John Donne, "No man is an island". Innately, we crave companionship, acknowledgement and compassion. We seek to be understood and reach out to be touched. Today, as strangers extended courtesy, I thought about how important it is we reciprocate and pay forward their kindness. Imagine, if instead of a scowl, we greeted with a smile, how much happier a place this world would be.

Day 23

Calm after the storm. For the last two days I have been off. Yesterday, I took my children to the pool, only to discover I had forgotten my bathing suit at home. Last night, I tried to adopt a stray cat (for the second time). I bathed it, dried it, brushed it and gave it flea medicine, only to face the horrible realization that I couldn't keep it due to my son's asthma and allergies. Today, I was terribly short with my children (numerous times) for no other reason than I was just out of sorts. All day long I searched for that kernel of happiness, but it just seemed to elude me. Finally, thankfully, my day turned around and I was able to laugh at the absurdity of life when after bathing my children, my son went to the potty and said, "Wipe my ... Mom". Just another ordinary reminder that " .... happens!" and some times you just gotta roll with the punches.

Day 22

"Careful, careful," he said, feeling a splash of scalding tea on his wrist. "Passion is all very well, but it wouldn't do to spill the tea."- Major's Pettigrew's Last Stand by Helen Simonson
Should you need a book to truly lift your spirits, here it is. I just finished Major's Pettigrew's Last Stand by Helen Simonson. I borrowed it from that venerable institution called the library for my Mom, but when she was done with it, read it myself. It is properly one of the most well written, delightful novels I've read in years. Trust me- you'll be sorry when the last page appears! (If you are in my book club, you'd better hold off as it might be a future read.)

Week 4 Watercolours

Postponed due to Stomach Bug. Feel better soon, good friend!

Day 21

I love the written word and all of it's forms. Whether it be a poem, a novel, a witticism, or simply the daily musing of an everyday being, I find words which have been written down hold much power. For me, writing is a way of keeping my mind fresh and helping to direct my stream of consciousness. Throughout the day, I compose endless prose, much of which never comes to fruition in a concrete medium such as paper in a journal. Perhaps, though, writing is something more. It is a desire for immortality, for a part of our essential being, our thoughts, to be left to others. In my bedside stand, I keep a stack of old, blank postcards. On these, I write notes to my children, so that when they are older, they will know how much I loved them and thought of them. In my computer, I keep a file of stories I have written. I may never get any of these published, but they are part of my legacy. And in this blog, I write, not for the satisfaction of knowing that I have an audience, but for the world which does not know me. Each time I post an entry, I cast my words into the infinite carousal of humanity's thoughts and musings. My words may never come back to me, nor may they influence a single person, but they are my own. They represent me and in them I find solace.

Day 20

Hooray! We're half way there .... or not! Because, of course, as I have discovered there are actually 46, not 40 days in Lent. Some people don't count Sundays, but to me, that's just cheating, so onward ...

Old movies. I love them and today I treated myself. Usually after I put the twins down for a nap, I settle down to work, but today I decided to opt out. Instead, I whipped up a batch of homemade banana chocolate chip muffins, brewed myself a pot of tea, hunkered down on the couch and watched a delightful old black and white movie. By the the time the twins awoke, I felt relaxed and refreshed. Everyone should do this every once and awhile. It was wonderful!

Day 19

I have a true love and passion for the diversity of people found on our planet. I love that I am married to a "foreigner" and that my children will grow up bilingual. I love to listen to husband's voice as he whispers sweet nothings into my ear in his own language and I love that two of my best friends are from far off lands. Today I celebrate the beauty of the people of this world and say, "As-Salamu Alaykum" - Peace be with you!

Day 18

I fell in love with African music when I was a young child. My father, who loved music, would play it for me and I would dance to it. Forty two years later it still resonates deep down within my soul. So, imagine my pleasure this morning when one my twins ran into the kitchen, stopped, looked up at me and said, "This is really pretty music Mommy." We listened to a variety of African artists for the next 3 hours and there was peace and tranquility in my home.

2 Links to 2 of my favorite African artists:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IecSMEH9ZVg&index=2&list=LLPJPe4K2WBhyoiWj9mT3GLw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dO8xnMCNK0

Day 17

Oh, what a beautiful morning! Oh, what a beautiful day! .... Today was the first day I opened the windows and door to my back porch. As I glanced out my windows, I was happy see a Robin, that faithful harbinger of Spring; so I vacuumed away the leaves, windexed the table and enjoyed my afternoon tea in the warm Spring sunshine. It was wonderful! Enjoy your weekend!

Day 16

Happy Spring! Today as I loaded the twins into the car, the warm sun kissed my cheeks and made me smile. After dropping them at Preschool, I drove over to the bank where I had a chance meeting with an old friend. How wonderful it was to see someone, who although I have never kept in touch with, is a true friend. Standing it the parking lot discussing our loved ones, politics and our favorite radio station, I was amazed at how easy it was to fall back into such a happy conversation. So this is for you- wherever you are- blessings and happiness in all you do.

Week 3 Watercolours (Acrylics)

                                                                         Happy Spring!

Day 15

Substitutes. Often times we don't get what we want in life. On a warm summer day, we may dream of riding in a convertible with the top down, but settle for the windows open in our Mommymobiles.  We may wish for a second cup of home brewed coffee, but opt for a McDonald's $1.00 special on the way to wherever it is we are going. Or we may simply desire a flatter, tighter tummy, but settle for a figure flattering top that hides the bumps and lumps. But substitutes are not all bad. In fact, many are a true blessing. When my husband is away and the cat meanders into the bed and graciously curls up in a ball next to me, it isn't the same, but I still feel warm and cozy. When I can't have drink because, of course as you well know, I've given up alcohol for Lent, a cup of hot herbal tea with honey will do. And when I haven't a minute of sanity as I've overbooked myself, a moment with my invisible audience can bring much peace. Because in reality substitutes are the real thing and living in the here and now and being able to find contentedness in the moment is true happiness.

"The art of being happy lies in the power of extracting happiness from common things." Henry Ward Beecher

Day 14

Per request: My recipe for Banana Cream Pie

1 Graham Cracker Crust (use my recipe from Day 5)
3 TBSP cornstarch
1 1/3 C. H2O
1 - 14 oz. can condensed milk
1 TBSP. butter
1 TBSP. margarine
3 egg yolks, beaten
1 tsp. vanilla
2 bananas, sliced & dipped in lemon juice (so they don't turn brown)

In saucepan, dissolve cornstarch in H2O, stir in condensed milk and egg yolks. Cook while stirring continuously  until thick. Remove from heat. Add margarine, butter & vanilla. Cool slightly. Pour into crust. Arrange bananas on top w/ whipped cream.

Homemade Whipped Cream
1 C. Heavy Whipping Cream
1/4 C. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
*** If you want a quick version of this recipe, use vanilla instant pudding (pie recipe) instead of cooked mixture.


and my little moment of happiness today:
Making homemade (from scratch) cupcakes and sharing them with my neighbors.  It was wonderful to watch their expressions as they opened their doors. I love my neighbors! ... and sent off 2nd Sun Submission - 3 more to go!

Day 13

Holding my son(s) in my arms. When I first found out that I was pregnant with my sons, I was terrified and overjoyed at the same time. The idea of motherhood, let alone the idea of twins, was daunting. As my pregnancy continued, my fears were doubled as I discovered one of my sons had Hydrocephalus. Once the twins were born, my stress levels continued to accelerate as my sons were both in the NICU. Then came the surgery for the Hydrocephalus, a zillion doctor appointments and many unanswered questions. When the twins came home, they were both so small that I had to wake them in the middle of the night to feed them  just to make sure they were getting enough nutrition. Rarely did I get enough sleep, have any peace of mind or any real time to just sit back and "hold my baby(ies)". Four years later things have gotten much better. I now get enough sleep, lead a relatively peaceful existence and have time to myself during nap time. At four and a half, my sons are full of energy, excitement and wonder. They hardly ever stop for a moment, so I try to enjoy every precious hug I get from them. Today as I sat down to write this, one of them started crying in his sleep. I stopped writing, went upstairs, picked him up and rocked him in my arms until he fell back to sleep. It felt good to hold him, to inhale the scent of his hair, to caress his cheek. I'll hold on to this moment for as long as I can.

Day 12

Sitting in church beside my husband gives me great joy. Each week I look forward to the time on Sunday morning when the twins go off to children's church and we can quietly listen to the word of the Lord together. As I slide over next to him closing the gap between us, and he takes my hand in his, I know that for this brief period of time we are of one mind.

Day 11

I love cooking for my family. When I was single, my friends used to call me up and ask me what was for dinner, knowing that I was preparing something delicious, even  if I wasn't entertaining. Since I got married, I have pretty much cooked from scratch every meal we have eaten, 1) to save money and 2) for the sheer joy of it and 3) for the satisfaction of knowing my family (esp. my husband) appreciates my home cooked meals. Today, after tucking the twins into their beds for their naps, I proceeded to the kitchen to make a dessert for dinner. After sifting through my recipe box for something that I hadn't made yet, I came upon a recipe for Banana Cream Pie. To my delight, I had all of the ingredients and I think it came our beautifully. I can't wait to unveil it tonight and watch my family's faces as they devour what I know will be a delicious treat!

Day 10

In the movie Mary Poppins, Mr. Banks said it best when he sang,
"Let's go fly a kite. Up to the highest height!
Let's go fly a kite and send it soaring
Up through the atmosphere
Up where the air is clear
Oh, let's go fly a kite!"
My father also loved kites and many a day happily wore a pin on his lapel which said, "Go fly a Kite."  (I think they were referring to entirely different things.)
I took the twins to the park today to launch our first March kite. There is true joy in something so simple as making a kite airborne. Happy Kite Flying!

Day 9

Forgiveness. A while ago, I read in my daily devotional about how special the name of God is and that we should always speak His name with reverence. This is something that as youth I failed to do, but now try very hard to follow, although I am not always successful. In doing so, it has become painful for me to listen to others speak lightly of His name. I think of how we cherish our own names (we would never refer to ourselves as "i"), and wonder how the Creator of the Universe feels when we take His name in vain. It must pain Him greatly, yet we continue to pepper our language in anger, in jest and even in just plain ignorance with derivatives of His name.

One day not long ago, I was in the gym locker room, and could no longer stand the casual use of His name. It seemed to come at me from every angle until my ears were ringing, so I decided to say something to one of the women who was speaking. I did in so as gently as possible, yet she was quite affronted. This bothered me for weeks. Every time I saw her at the gym, I wanted to apologize, not for my words, but my manner.  I was afraid that I had ruined her day, and that perhaps she paid forward my impertinence. Today, however, I finally had my opportunity. I explained to her the situation, apologized to her fully and asked her forgiveness. She was very kind, and understanding and now a great weight has been lifted off my heart. Perhaps, too, a little of my "faith" in humanity has been restored. Forgiveness. One of God's great gifts to us. Something we can do for one another.

Week 2 Watercolours (Acrylics)

Dreaming of a Tropical Paradise

Day 8

I am not rich, but I am not poor. My husband and I live paycheck to paycheck. Sometimes we aren't sure how we manage the bills, but they usually get paid. My children want for nothing, but they do not have everything. They have what they need and for this I am grateful. My family has been incredibly generous and without them, I'm not sure how we could have survived. I am very careful with the money I receive for the children's birthdays.  I cannot afford to "put it away" for the future, but I am always frugal with it.

When the twins were born, my mother told me about an article she had read on birthdays. One woman wrote that each of her children received a new toy, a new book and an option for their birthday. The option was always something they wanted, but not necessarily something for which the parents had to pay (ex. one child loved farms, so the parents arranged for the child to spend a day with neighbor who had a farm). I have tried to follow this example, except that again family has blessed me. They usually buy my children toys and I have an aunt who reviews children's books, and graciously passes them on after she has reviewed them. So I focus on the options. Today I exercised one of those options and splurged on the twins. I bought them something totally impractical, but something I knew they would love -rain boots. To me this was a huge unnecessary expense. One that I may never repeat, but today as I watched my children splashing in the rain puddles during our afternoon walk, I knew that this gift was priceless.

Day 7

Water. Our bodies are made up of it. It is tasteless, odorless and exists in 3 forms.  When I swim in it, I feel as if I am apart of it. With each stroke I take, my arms and legs break through it, pushing aside all doubts, fears and troubles I have. Baptized in it, I am renewed and forgiven. Each time I drink of it, I am refreshed and my thirst is quenched. Today I celebrate it as my favorite combination of elements. 

Day 6

Peaceful Play Dates. Is this an oxymoron? I think not! My cousin and I have been doing play dates with our four children, all of whom are under the age of 4 for about 2 years. We have watched them play, laugh, bicker and grow together. Some days they have all been at odds, but today was blissful. We read books, did a craft, and made pizza together with only a few minor mishaps. My cousin and I even got to sit and sip our tea/coffee together (for a while). Ah, how I relish these days!

Day 5

Chocolate! Need I say more? Enjoy this simple recipe - not an original, but with slight variations.

Chocolate Pie
2 C. Milk Chocolate Chips, melted
1 Pkg (8 oz) Cream Cheese, room temperature
1 tsp. Vanilla
1 C. Heavy Whipping Cream, whipped
1-2 TBSP Mini Chocolate Chips

Beat Big Chocolate Chips, Cream Cheese & Vanilla until Fluffy. Fold Whipped Cream into mixture. Spoon into pie crust. Top with mini- chocolate chips. Refrigerate for 2 hrs.

Pie Crust
7 Graham Crackers, crushed (not to dust)
1/4 C. Margerine, melted
1/2 C. Sugar

Mix together & pack into pie crust.

*** To make for St. Paddy's Day, add 1-2 TBSP Irish Cream Liquor per taste to Pie Recipe.

Day 4

Peace and Quiet. How often we wish for just a little bit of this, but how rarely do we receive it. Sometimes we are blessed with an abundance of it. Sometimes it is a true task to just carve out a few lone minutes, but today I had a whole hour. Usually the cat wakes me at 7. Then I groggily pad downstairs to feed her, start my coffee, and begin to read my devotions as I wait for the children to wake up. But today everyone slept in, even the cat. I awoke at 8, not to the sound of howling for food, but to silence. As I sat up, the cat stared at me and then remembered she hadn't eaten yet. So together we crept downstairs and enjoyed an entire hour of peace and quiet. When the children awoke, they were refreshed and so was I. What a nice surprise!

Week One Watercolours

Mums By This Mum and That Mum

Day 3

Sometimes trying to find happiness in everyday life is like looking for a needle in a haystack. That needle can be overlooked when tedious tasks abound or can be simply overshadowed by one careless remark which begins the downward spiral. Yet, when one looks hard enough for an object or simply searches for it from different angles, one can be surprised at how brightly it gleams in the sunlight. The secret, of course, is adjusting one's perspective. Today as I took one of my twin's to one of his many therapy appointments, I looked down at him and thought about how much I love him. I felt his hand in mine and was struck by the soft, smallness of it. At that moment, I stopped, bent down, looked him in the eyes, and told him I loved him. As he stared back into my eyes and said "I love you Mommy.", my heart filled with joy, and I thought, "Yes, all of this is worth it."

Day 2

Happy Day! Swam 5 extra minutes today! Don't laugh - I'm going for time here, not number of laps. (Normally I swim for about 30 minutes, 2X a week.) That extra 5 was a killer, but it felt great! It paid off because the man in the next lane suggested I join his swim team. I said for what - middle aged ladies? Apparently, the man was serious - it's an all ages group. You race against time, although you swim with different age groups. Maybe next year. / Paid hair compliments forward while in grocery store and they came back full circle while later on walking to get the mail.  / Ate wonderful lunch- fresh avocado, cherry tomatoes, hummus and pita chips - am Mediterranean Goddess! / And oh yes, 2nd article published! Does that make me officially a writer? Or is there some imaginary number I have to obtain? I think maybe it's 5. 

"For every moment you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Day 1

Pajama Day! Except I don't do pajamas so fuzzy JLO inspired velour pants will have to do. Also, No fighting with children day...Was rather successful in sloughing it today. Let twins choose their own lunch - requests included crackers, apples and crepes. Kudos to me for raising them to request/expect healthy food. No crepes in sight as husband is out of town and can't imagine how he makes them. Tomato soup worked instead- that's right twin four year olds eating tomato soup without a mess (the trick is to add goldfish to the soup and tell them to go fishing). Started first writing topic. Moved Watercoulour Wednesday to Friday night (which might be hard to do with no margaritas). Hooray- Mom surprised me by joining in on my no alcohol binge. Strange - blogging is like writing my stream consciousness down, except I feel the need to constantly edit just in case anyone actually ever reads this. Best moment today- not having to go outside in cold weather!

Fasnacht

Happy Fasnacht to me and anyone else who may read this. Tomorrow begins my 40 Days of Happiness project. During this time I will endeavor to do the following: Give up Alcohol for Lent (which should be really hard since Spring always seems to inspire Tanqueray & Tonics and Perfect Margaritas), complete 5/6 writing prompts for The Sun (I'm giving myself a little leave way by only needing to complete 5 and not the full 6), have Watercolour Wednesdays with my best friend (and yes- I do love the British spelling of the word "watercolour"), blog about at least one moment of happiness that occurs each day, and oh, yes- force myself to continue to send my children's stories to publishers and perhaps contact an artist who might consider illustrating my children's stories. Wow!  Now that I have that all down, it seems like a lot, but who knows, I'm just as curious as you are - my phantom audience - to see if I stick to any if not all of my project.